Kellers in Africa

our life in Zambia

Page 3 of 15

Grow Carrots They Said…

It’s easy they said!

Before I tell you my sad tale, there’s something you should know about Africa.  Everything is bigger here.  The trees are bigger.  The animals are bigger.  The insects are bigger.  Everything that can be bigger IS.

Then there’s something you should know about me. I can’t grow anything. At all. Horticulture hates me. Bring me the vegetables and I’ll give you an entree that Jamie Oliver wouldn’t turn down. Bring me the plant and it will shrivel on the way in the door, begging for mercy all the way.

In case you thought I was exaggerating.

In case you thought I was exaggerating.

However, I firmly believe “nothing ventured, nothing gained” and this last year I determined to conquer my nemesis: the vegetable garden. After talking to a variety of home gardeners I found a general consensus: Carrots. Anyone can grow carrots. After considering the fact that preschoolers even grow carrots from carrot tops, I decided even I could not screw this up. I sallied forth with seeds: carrot, onion, and cauliflower (because I am a masochist at heart). I cleared, mulched, and tenderly planted those tiny seeds in the soil. I’ll confess that I was skeptical. After decades of failure (my preschool carrot didn’t survive the week) could I hope to see those seeds germinate? Survive??  Produce some FOOD?!

While I waited to see if Tim’s fond epithet “the Minus Touch” might be overcome with a little care and patience, Monica planted some flowers. Apparently the plant kingdom does not hold one’s unfortunate genes against them.

white fluffy flowers and pink puffy flowers. I am such a horticulturist. Ok, Monica grew these.  I had nothing to do with it.

white fluffy flowers and pink puffy flowers.
I am such a horticulturist.
Ok, Monica grew these. I had nothing to do with it.

With time, water, and sunshine my carrots did grow.  And much to my surprise they actually looked… great.  Lacey green fans promising a juicy, crisp harvest before long.  As the carrot tops began to expand I decided to take a little sneak peek at my gardening victory.

Frankenstein's salad.

Frankenstein’s salad.

Apparently the nematodes are bigger in Africa is well.

Freakiest carrot I have ever seen and apparently NOT edible (unless you like ingesting nematode egg sacks).

Freakiest carrot I have ever seen and apparently NOT edible (unless you like ingesting nematode egg sacks).

 

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. At least we have flowers!!

Olivia takes time to smell the... whatever those flowers are :)

Olivia takes time to smell the… whatever those flowers are 🙂

Please share your gardening failures so I don’t feel like such a loser.  You know… unless you don’t have any of those stories… in which case you can just go away and enjoy your garden.

Undressing Missions

Recently there has been a lot of talk around the internet and blog-osphere about MISSIONS.  Mostly I’ve seen people hashing out the million ways it’s being done wrong: wrecking culture, producing dependency, maligning the name of Christ, etc.  Really bad stuff- and really going on in some places.

Naturally, I find the whole discussion fascinating.

In Missions there are as many opinions as there are methods.
Wait… I think there are actually more opinions… (for better or worse)

There is certainly and undeniably a reason why the Church at large is having a second look at missions.  And this is possibly one of the most positive aspects of the whole discussion- people are looking at missions.  I’m hoping this has the same effect that a movie production does for book sales.  Let’s face it, few of us read the classics until the movie comes out.  Maybe this spotlight on missions will propel a new wave of missionaries into the world.  As people have the opportunity to consider and critique world missions, maybe they’ll feel compelled to head out here themselves.

The thoughts expressed by interested bloggers have been really interesting.  MORE interesting have been the comments these posts have generated.  Everyone has an opinion about how Missions should be done- and this is (usually) a great thing.  HOWEVER, one observation I’d like to throw out into cyberspace (let’s go ahead and call it my “two cents”):

It’s no more possible to generalize Missions than it is to delineate parenting and project the definite outcome.  Or the future.  Or war.  Or the working out of our faith in Christ.  Because those things make up missions.  And adding the aspect of cross-cultural to Missions means increasing the variables and uncertainty.

Let’s absolutely dialogue about Missions and how to do it better.  But let’s bear in mind that Missions is about people and people don’t fit well into absolute formulas.

“Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.”
Proverbs 16:3

I challenge you to look- really look at world missions. Look at what is being done poorly. Look at what is being done well. Then ask the hard question:
“God, how should I be involved?”

Nobody loves me, everybody hates me…

Guess I’ll go eat worms!!

Remember that song from summer camp? So cute.
“Long, thin, slimy ones; short, fat, squishy ones; itsy-bitsy, fuzzy-wuzzy worms!!!!!!”

Well, it’s all fun and games until you see them in the toilet!

Roundworms can be passed from our furry friends.
They cause severe bloating, intestinal pain, lethargy, etc.
They are disgusting and they can be living in YOU.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ah yes. While parasites are common in EVERY part of the world (yes, friend, you too could have them!), they are a particular menace in Africa. Parasites seem to cling to every leaf, rock, crevice, droplet, hair, and fiber.

You’ve seen a dog frantically scratching it’s rear on the grass right?
These bad boys are known for causing, ahem, “perineal itching”
Good times.

But, wait! There’s more!!!

so many options

So what’s a mom to do? Well, there are a few great anti-parasitic medications out here, but you just can’t take them as often as you get exposed (infected!) with the nasty little buggers.

ah, Albendazole, my friend. By the time a year lapses we are soooo ready for you.

too bad it’s also REALLY toxic for humans!

Fortunately there are many other safe options. We’ve tried all kinds of herbal concoctions and have our favorites.

Paragone… it tastes likes strawberries and the capsules are TINY. Need I say more?? Even Olivia will beg for this one.

Yes, he is wearing elephant pjs. I’m lucky if he lets me wash them.
Down the hatch, Freddy!

Raw pumpkin seeds paralyze tape worms.
Puree a big handful with some honey & eat a generous helping on an empty stomach.
You’ll find out what’s on the inside.
Try it. I dare you. 🙂

Homemade wormwood and black walnut capsules. When I made these I wasn’t sure they’d be worth the effort………… oh, they so are.

You see where it says “1/2 pound”. Notice how much of that we’ve already consumed? Before making our home here in Zambia I didn’t know it was humanly POSSIBLE to put down that much clove powder. Desperate times, desperate tummy aches…. hey, Christmas flavored burps- can’t go wrong!

But the best, the strongest, the all-time heavy weight champion:

Oh yes. It burns going down. It burns its way through. It burns coming out again. But it burns those parasites too….
DEATH… by cayenne pepper.

bottle half empty
in the 4 years we’ve lived here I’ve bought nearly a kilogram of cayenne pepper.
That’s over 2 pounds.
And it’s almost all gone.
Burn, baby, burn!

Down goes the first one, down goes the second one……….
oh how they wiggle and squirm!

Actually, though, we’ve been pretty lucky. We have our occasional outbreaks of ringworm and pinworms, we’ve had a few rounds with giardia and amoebic dysentery, oh, and I suppose Tim has had roundworms a few times. And tapeworms… but considering our level of exposure…. I’m grateful it hasn’t been worse.

Don’t even go there, Mom

Why do we do this again??

Missions is so glamorous. We get to do all kinds of awesome, world-changing activities everyday, dynamically affecting every person we meet. When we get sick we are at least consoled that the diseases are exotic (read: involve diarrhea)- no humdrum headcolds for us!  We regularly enjoy flavorful, indigenous foods like boiled cornmeal and okra. We live right alongside magnificent and dangerous wildlife like lions spiders and giraffes snakes.  We get to tell thrilling stories about parasites, broken vehicles, and cultural disasters.  It’s the dream life, baby. Why don’t more people sign up???

Delicious local cuisine. Yum.

“Wait, I sense sarcasm.  Do you mean you aren’t actually riding around on an elephant, passing out tracts and singing ‘I’ll Fly Away’ in the local language??  I’m so disillusioned!”

Ok, so if it’s not everything that the big fund-raising gigs and missions conferences crack it up to be, then what’s the real story? If every day is not a Billy Graham crusade, then what is it? Do we not chase down every man, woman, and child in Kabwe and ascertain their stance on Christ and eternity? And what about the starving? The orphaned? And AIDS, yeesh, shouldn’t that issue alone take up at least 2 or 3 days of my week?? “Reaching the lost”, “discipleship”, “building relationships”… what does it all MEAN?

The short version? It means we work our butts off against a daily list of challenges and difficulties, and we do it because we’re crazy. Wait… that’s not right. We do it because it makes us feel good about ourselves. No, that definitely doesn’t apply to the last 5 weeks of my life. One last try:
We work in Africa because it needs to be done and because the Lord loves the poor.  Serving pleases Him so we do it (those are Tim’s words, I couldn’t figure out how to say it without sounding oh-so-hyper-spiritual and la-di-da).  Serving others, making disciples, and increasing His kingdom makes God happy, whether it’s through the “daily grind” in your community in the States or in the great Battle Against the Elements in Africa.  As the Body of Christ we are (or should be) working with a “kingdom mentality”.  Ok, there I go again, what does THAT mean?!

The bottom line is: we, the Kellers, work and serve in many ways.  Sometimes it’s teaching Zambians about Christ or how to evangelize.  Sometimes it’s preaching, teaching, discipling, leading, training or preparing for those things.  Sometimes it’s spending three days trying to get the correct pipe for our water tank because the local “shops” all carry EXTREMELY cheap Chinese-made GARBAGE and you have to find it in their backroom yourself under piles of other cheap garbage (after waiting in line for hours on end).  Ok, done ranting now.

Home Depot

In my experience, “making a difference for Christ” is never easy.  And here the “devil is in the water” so to speak (well giardia and E.coli are anyway).  The physical challenges are daunting.  Overwhelming, occasionally mind-crippling, frustrating, discouraging- these are all part and parcel of our work.  Disease (not just germs, I’m talking real disease), parasites, heat, language barriers, cultural barriers, government finagling, financial restrictions, distance from loved ones, poor food, bugs, rats, thieves…. the list can go on and on and… anyway….

And WHY?  “Why did I sign up for this again???”  Is a question I ask myself every once in a great while at least once a month week more often than a woman on a mission should.  Why?  Well, I can go super-spiritual and tell you that the devil has a foothold in Africa (which would be true). I can be practical and tell you that this continent has not had the benefits of millennia of civilization like Europe has (and even North and South America to a lesser extent).  This would also be true.

But the real problem?  The actual reality?  The difficulty, the challenge, the issue we deal with in missions?  It might surprise you.  In fact, I bet you can relate on a personal level:

It’s a fallen world.  It’s a world that does not embrace Christ and grace.

Being a part of the Body of Christ means taking on the bad with the good.  And there’s a lot of bad here.  But there is a lot of GOOD too.  A lot.  There are a lot of people who respond JOYFULLY to the news of redemption- true forgiveness and grace.  We so take God for granted in the States, but in Zambia, enslaved by animism, people shake off the shackles with incredible joy.

Joy in adversity

So there it is.  We’re in Africa because…

oh come on, we’re here because we are definitely, positively, at least a little bit crazy.

And we like it here.

God bless Africa.

Home again, home again, jiggity- uh… wait, diarrhea doesn’t rhyme



We are finally back home in Africa! After a marathon container pack and load in March and April, we packed our THIRTEEN suitcases up and headed home. (Don’t even ask me how I ended up with that many check-ins after we shipped an 18 ton container. Life happens!) 😛

Plus three car seats, 6 carry-ons, 3 children, a stroller, and about 6lbs of snack food (who likes airplane food??).

The flights went much better than expected. Frederick (now 3) had a meltdown or two, but for that little OCD monkey… that’s not too bad! Fortunately his “blank-let” was along for the ride and totally saved the day (and the sanity of a few hundred haggard passengers) 😀 Olivia did GREAT. She didn’t sleep much for 30 hours… but she did great nonetheless! One of the kind and attentive flight attendants said to me at about 3am, “My. She doesn’t stop moving, does she??” Nope. I’m very thankful the check-in lady was kind enough to get us as many bulkhead seats as she could manage (God bless British Airways)!

You aren’t tired, are you?

Frederick in Heathrow (after 5 hours of being force-marched up and down the length of the terminal). We were tired… but more importantly… so was he!!!

We arrived bright and early and our friends brought not one, but TWO cars to pick us and our luggage up and transport us all back to Kabwe. Driving home was a little strange- Lusaka has such a burgeoning economy that even in our absence much had changed. Most noticeably: the roads were even more congested. Ah well.

Our first day home was great (if exhausting). We kept the kids up late so they actually slept pretty well (midnight to 9am!) Friday morning all seemed well….. then Olivia seemed to be melting. I mean we’d set her on the floor and she’d just kinda slump over. :L I called it jetlag and carried on. By bedtime a fever set in… and I spent half the night nursing, jiggling, patting, walking, and cleaning up diarrhea diapers and puke. You know, for a 15 month old, she has GREAT projection. Just sayin’. But that was only half the night, right? Good catch. You see, the other half was spent with Olivia AND Frederick. Who also has projectile vomiting down to an art from. Who knew? Our family is so talented.

This was Saturday morning. It was a full 48 hours before he would eat a single mouthful of food. Poor kid didn’t have much weight to lose. Imagine this minus 5 lbs 🙁

Saturday and Sunday are now kind of a blur. I remember changing about 2,465,894 pairs of diarrhea pants from Frederick and another few million diarrhea diapers from Olivia. Oh, did I mention that we hadn’t gone shopping yet?? Praise GOD we had left a bunch of wipes in the cupboard and the cloth diapers were ready to go!!! I did NOT have enough disposables in the diaper bag to get through that putrid marathon! I would have been resorting to desperate measures like wash cloths inside ziplock baggie pants! And yes, I have really done that. (Desperate times, desperate times!) 😀 I’m also incredibly thankful for our neighbor, Christel, who had the food basics waiting for us in our kitchen (and a camping fridge for us to borrow since ours somehow broke while it was turned off!) And for water kefir! I had NO yogurt, NO probiotics, NO dry toast for these poor diarrhea bellies. But I DID have all my precious cultures, packed with TLC (by another amazing friend, Joy) and carefully transported all the way to Zambia.

Three cheers for probiotic home brewing (NO, not THAT kind of brewing!)

It’s amazing how God supplies, though. In the last week I’ve probably averaged 3-5 hours of sleep a night. Any one who knows me will tell you that I do not function on less than 8 hours. 9 is better. 10 is awesome. (How am I surviving motherhood???) 😉 But I am really feeling ok. Now, I’m not volunteering to add anything to my to-do list… Fred and I are still dashing to the bathroom every 45 minutes or so… but I’m very thankful for the energy needed to take care of my babies. (And Timothy… who’s also sick. But he takes himself to the bathroom.) Then there are the little big things like there being an ample supply of wipes in our cupboard. Seriously, I would have been outside hosing their little butts off at 2 am if not for those precious packages of prelubricated, disposable convenience!!

Oh, one last thing. Our sewage pipes are blocked. Diarrhea goes down and………..

welcome back to Africa!!

« Older posts Newer posts »

© 2019 Kellers in Africa

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑